This week, I received two interesting e-mails in my Inbox.
The first came yesterday, telling me that the results of my 3-hour GTT were in. As I checked them online, my heart thudded and I felt almost sick. I had prepared myself for the possibility of gestational diabetes the best that I could, but really? I just wanted to pass the damn test. I long for a complication-free pregnancy on this third go-around, since my last two pregnancies have not been without their trials. But I’m happy to announce that, as far as I can tell, everything looks pretty decent. Three out of four of my blood draws were in the middle of the normal range. Perfectly average. The only reading that was flagged as “HIGH” was my 2-hour blood draw and I’m not surprised by that at all. I have taken this test before, while not pregnant, and also failed the 2-hour blood draw at that time. I haven’t heard from my doctor yet regarding the results, but I’m a big believer in no news is good news. They have always been quick to contact me when there was an issue, so the fact that my phone has been silent can only be a good sign, as far as I’m concerned. I did google it and it seems that some patients who have one abnormal number in the 3-hour test will be advised by their doctors to re-test later in pregnancy, but for now, I think I’m in the clear. And that makes me so happy that I could do a backflip — except I’m pregnant and have never been able to do a backflip even when my womb is empty. But suffice it to say, I’m over-the-moon and tremendously relieved. I have exactly 11 weeks until my due date and I want nothing more than to just enjoy every second of this long-awaited for pregnancy.
The second e-mail of interest arrived just moments ago. It’s from my friend Kat. Remember her? It’s been over four weeks since I poured my heart out to her in that long e-mail and I had just about given up on expecting a response. But it’s here now, still unopened because I’m too scared to read it. I want to wait until Honey gets home from work, at least. Maybe I’ll have him read it and let me know how bad it is. Tomorrow, we leave on a road trip to visit family in Idaho and I wonder if it’s wisest to wait until our return to open the e-mail? Do I want it weighing on me all weekend??? I’ve waited this long; surely I can wait a few more days. But I’m also curious. And I kinda just want to rip off the bandaid. I want to know what she has to say. But I don’t. It’s complicated. And confusing. I don’t know. I guess, for now, I’m just playing a game to see how long I can hold out. Kind of like I do when I want some chocolate cake.
Which, now that I’ve mentioned it, sounds really good right now. Thank goodness there’s none around to tempt me.